Michelle Julia Gringler, who touched so many people during her all
too short life, will always be that precious jewel, now and forever lost. We
will always be looking for her around every corner for the rest of our lives.
Our beautiful daughter, who was born in Toronto on September 30, 1976,
was twenty-six years old when she passed away unexpectedly on July 11,
2003 from a rare illness called TTP. At the time, she was in New Brunswick
on a business trip working as a Development Officer and Policy Coordinator
for the Canadian International Development Agency of the Federal Government
of Canada.
Michelle had many accomplishments in her young life. She was on the
honour role at high school. She graduated summa cum laude in Social
Sciences, Hon. Criminology/ Conc. Psychology and achieved a gold medal for being one of the top students at The University of Ottawa. She also obtained
Her Masters Degree in Criminology summa cum laude from The University of
Ottawa. She had written her thesis, for which she devoted herself for over a
year, and it was published in 2002.
Michelle was an extraordinary person. She was a brilliant student, honest,
intelligent, vivacious and devoted to those she loved. She had an upbeat
personality. Her glowing smile brightened everything around her. Her
passion in life was to help people in need.
Once again we would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for
their thoughtful support during this most traumatic and tragic
time in our lives.
I would like to read the poem we have inscribed on Michelle's headstone.
It reflects the pain that we share with other parents who have lost their dear
children, and clearly describes how we feel.
If tears could build a stairway, and memories were a lane, we would walk
right up to heaven to bring you home again. No farewell words were spoken,
no time to say goodbye, you were gone before we knew it and only God
knows why. Our hearts still ache in sadness and secret tears still flow. What
it meant to lose you no one will ever know.
The worst day of our lives was the day we learned that our beloved daughter, Michelle Julia, passed away at around ten in the morning on Friday July 11, 2003.
My husband and I were proud and excited that day because our son, Jason, who is an Artist, was participating in his first art exhibition, in Toronto at Nathan Philips Square. I was preparing a vegetarian lunch for my son because I knew that he would be standing all day at his booth tending to his art and my husband was going to help him carry and set up his work. It was a joint family effort.
That week, Michelle was on her first business trip for the Government of Canada. She was arranging a C.I.D.A. meeting with some of Ministers and C.I.D.A. staff in New Brunswick. It was very exiting for her and for us. This was her first job after having completed school, which included a four year criminology undergraduate degree and a two year master's degree. She was a brilliant student who had graduated summa cum laude.
Michelle called me on preceding Monday evening saying she was not feeling that well. she thought perhaps she ate something that did not agree with her and said she was exceptionally tired and wanted to have a bit of a nap as they had a party to go to and she wanted to be there. Thinking nothing of it, I told her to rest and have a great time.
On the following Wednesday evening I received a phone call from Michelle's boyfriend, Ryan, who lived in Ottawa, stating that Michelle was in the Hospital. I immediately contacted the hospital and was told not to worry and that Michelle was going through some tests. I explained that she was in New Brunswick by herself and that they should take good care of her. The next day I spoke to Michelle and she said she was very tired now and that we would speak later. We were unaware of anything serious because no one had indicated that there was anything serious to worry about.
I called my friend Monica, who was to accompany me on a visit to the art show and cancelled the trip because the hospital had called to indicate that Michelle has a blood problem. She immediately asked me if Michelle had T.T.P. I had never heard of T.T.P. She told me that she was a survivor of T.T.P. and that as a young woman she had almost died. I became alarmed and called the hospital and spoke to the nurses who told me that the doctor had left for the evening and that he would speak to me the next day. No one at the hospital gave it a sense of urgency. The next morning the doctor confirmed that Michelle had T.T.P. Still not knowing how dangerous the situation was, I told the doctor that I wanted my daughter to fly home right away because my friend had this disorder and her doctor had a great deal of experience with it and would be able to look after her. He said he knew this doctor and he worked under him, but Michelle was far too ill to travel. I got very anxious and began preparing to fly to New Brunswick. As I was packing and shaking with fear, the telephone rang and the doctor informed me that Michelle had died. She was just gone and I did not even know what had really happened or why.
We were so devastated. Nothing made sense. I was angry at the whole medical system because I thought it had somehow failed our daughter and us. Michelle had not been feeling well for a while. She went to her doctor in Ottawa but according to Michelle's friends, the medical check only lasted ten minutes and the doctor felt Michelle had too many complaints. Michelle had come organized with a list of issues and questions so she would not take up too much of the doctor's time. I also heard, after her death, that when a co-worker accompanied her to a family doctor in New Brunswick, they sent her back to her hotel with Gravol without checking her blood condition. The next day she was so sick that her co-worker insisted on calling an ambulance which took her to a small hospital which recognized they were unable to handle her condition. Another ambulance transported her to the regional hospital, St. John.
We could second guess all of the medical personnel question the actions of those involved and wonder whether she was misdiagnosed or simply fell through the cracks, but all of this change nothing. Our family was devastated and our misery and sadness lasted a very long time. Hearts were broken, rivers of tears were shed and there were many sleepless nights. Michelle was only twenty-six and she would miss most of the joy and wonderful moments a woman can experience, such as marriage, children and the love of her family and friends. She would involuntarily skip life itself.
Michelle will always be cherished and remembered by us and by those who knew her. She was our precious jewel who gave us fond memories. We hope that one day soon the many healthcare professionals involved in research will invent or stumble upon a cure for this often fatal disease and turn our tears into smiles. We love you Michelle.
July 11, 2003. How do I begin to describe the feeling of shock and sadness upon hearing the news of Michelle's death? Let me start at the beginning....
The Gringler and Fraizinger families have been intertwined for a very long time, beginning with the development of a close friendship when Tom and Rosie were newly married and Issy and I were an "old" married couple, having been married four years earlier. After a short period of infrequent communication, when we were both struggling with careers, babies, etc., we re-connected and never looked back. Our families shared all special occasions and family highlights together. In fact, Rosie and I worked together, as well, and this gave us an extra layer of closeness. And.it provided me with an opportunity to see how incredibly Michelle and Jason, Rosie's and Tom's children, were developing. It soon became apparent that Michelle was an extraordinary child, with exceptional intellect and mental prowess. Every other week (or so it seemed) Michelle was receiving accolades and awards from educational institutions.
Fast forward several years and we find Michelle a beautiful, charming, intelligent and charismatic young lady. Newly graduated from the University of Ottawa, Michelle embarked on the career of her choice. Always passionate about making a difference in this world, Michelle took a position with the Government of Canada, so that she could position herself for that very role. Everyone who knew Michelle had no doubt that she would succeed and we were all so proud of her.
July 11, 2003 changed everything. Not just for her family, not just for her friends but, I personally, believe it changed things for everyone. Michelle would have made a difference. The loss is impossible to define.
I heard the news via telephone and time stood still. The shock was even greater because, along with Michelle's family, no one understood that there was any kind of serious medical problem. I participated in a memorial service, for Michelle, along with so many others, including many dignitaries who spoke of her in glowing terms. Everyone was numb and moving about in a kind of a daze.
I am not going to go into the details leading up to this tragic event. Who was wrong, who was right, did the medical system fail Michelle? I will just say that, personally, I believe every step of this medical journey was fraught with complacency and misdiagnosis. Bottom line: nothing will bring Michelle back. The hole is permanent and the loss incomprehensible. Can we do something to change things so that something like this can be prevented for another young person? I hope so. I know that Michelle's family are doing what they can to raise awareness about TTP.
When I think of Michelle, now, (which I do very often), I see her beautiful smile and I feel privileged that I was able to be part of her life and she part of mine.
In Memory of Michelle Julia Gringler
Michelle Julia Gringler, who touched so many people during her all too short life, will always be that precious jewel, now and forever lost. We will always be looking for her around every corner for the rest of our lives. Our beautiful daughter, who was born in Toronto on September 30, 1976, was twenty-six years old when she passed away unexpectedly on July 11, 2003 from a rare illness called TTP. At the time, she was in New Brunswick on a business trip working as a Development Officer and Policy Coordinator for the Canadian International Development Agency of the Federal Government of Canada.
Michelle had many accomplishments in her young life. She was on the honour role at high school. She graduated summa cum laude in Social Sciences, Hon. Criminology/ Conc. Psychology and achieved a gold medal for being one of the top students at The University of Ottawa. She also obtained Her Masters Degree in Criminology summa cum laude from The University of Ottawa. She had written her thesis, for which she devoted herself for over a year, and it was published in 2002.
Michelle was an extraordinary person. She was a brilliant student, honest, intelligent, vivacious and devoted to those she loved. She had an upbeat personality. Her glowing smile brightened everything around her. Her passion in life was to help people in need.
Once again we would like to take this opportunity to thank everyone for their thoughtful support during this most traumatic and tragic time in our lives.
I would like to read the poem we have inscribed on Michelle's headstone. It reflects the pain that we share with other parents who have lost their dear children, and clearly describes how we feel.
If tears could build a stairway, and memories were a lane, we would walk right up to heaven to bring you home again. No farewell words were spoken, no time to say goodbye, you were gone before we knew it and only God knows why. Our hearts still ache in sadness and secret tears still flow. What it meant to lose you no one will ever know.
We Love You Michelle,
Mom, Dad and Jason
The worst day of our lives was the day we learned that our beloved daughter, Michelle Julia, passed away at around ten in the morning on Friday July 11, 2003.
My husband and I were proud and excited that day because our son, Jason, who is an Artist, was participating in his first art exhibition, in Toronto at Nathan Philips Square. I was preparing a vegetarian lunch for my son because I knew that he would be standing all day at his booth tending to his art and my husband was going to help him carry and set up his work. It was a joint family effort.
That week, Michelle was on her first business trip for the Government of Canada. She was arranging a C.I.D.A. meeting with some of Ministers and C.I.D.A. staff in New Brunswick. It was very exiting for her and for us. This was her first job after having completed school, which included a four year criminology undergraduate degree and a two year master's degree. She was a brilliant student who had graduated summa cum laude.
Michelle called me on preceding Monday evening saying she was not feeling that well. she thought perhaps she ate something that did not agree with her and said she was exceptionally tired and wanted to have a bit of a nap as they had a party to go to and she wanted to be there. Thinking nothing of it, I told her to rest and have a great time.
On the following Wednesday evening I received a phone call from Michelle's boyfriend, Ryan, who lived in Ottawa, stating that Michelle was in the Hospital. I immediately contacted the hospital and was told not to worry and that Michelle was going through some tests. I explained that she was in New Brunswick by herself and that they should take good care of her. The next day I spoke to Michelle and she said she was very tired now and that we would speak later. We were unaware of anything serious because no one had indicated that there was anything serious to worry about.
I called my friend Monica, who was to accompany me on a visit to the art show and cancelled the trip because the hospital had called to indicate that Michelle has a blood problem. She immediately asked me if Michelle had T.T.P. I had never heard of T.T.P. She told me that she was a survivor of T.T.P. and that as a young woman she had almost died. I became alarmed and called the hospital and spoke to the nurses who told me that the doctor had left for the evening and that he would speak to me the next day. No one at the hospital gave it a sense of urgency. The next morning the doctor confirmed that Michelle had T.T.P. Still not knowing how dangerous the situation was, I told the doctor that I wanted my daughter to fly home right away because my friend had this disorder and her doctor had a great deal of experience with it and would be able to look after her. He said he knew this doctor and he worked under him, but Michelle was far too ill to travel. I got very anxious and began preparing to fly to New Brunswick. As I was packing and shaking with fear, the telephone rang and the doctor informed me that Michelle had died. She was just gone and I did not even know what had really happened or why.
We were so devastated. Nothing made sense. I was angry at the whole medical system because I thought it had somehow failed our daughter and us. Michelle had not been feeling well for a while. She went to her doctor in Ottawa but according to Michelle's friends, the medical check only lasted ten minutes and the doctor felt Michelle had too many complaints. Michelle had come organized with a list of issues and questions so she would not take up too much of the doctor's time. I also heard, after her death, that when a co-worker accompanied her to a family doctor in New Brunswick, they sent her back to her hotel with Gravol without checking her blood condition. The next day she was so sick that her co-worker insisted on calling an ambulance which took her to a small hospital which recognized they were unable to handle her condition. Another ambulance transported her to the regional hospital, St. John.
We could second guess all of the medical personnel question the actions of those involved and wonder whether she was misdiagnosed or simply fell through the cracks, but all of this change nothing. Our family was devastated and our misery and sadness lasted a very long time. Hearts were broken, rivers of tears were shed and there were many sleepless nights. Michelle was only twenty-six and she would miss most of the joy and wonderful moments a woman can experience, such as marriage, children and the love of her family and friends. She would involuntarily skip life itself.
Michelle will always be cherished and remembered by us and by those who knew her. She was our precious jewel who gave us fond memories. We hope that one day soon the many healthcare professionals involved in research will invent or stumble upon a cure for this often fatal disease and turn our tears into smiles. We love you Michelle.
July 11, 2003. How do I begin to describe the feeling of shock and sadness upon hearing the news of Michelle's death? Let me start at the beginning.... The Gringler and Fraizinger families have been intertwined for a very long time, beginning with the development of a close friendship when Tom and Rosie were newly married and Issy and I were an "old" married couple, having been married four years earlier. After a short period of infrequent communication, when we were both struggling with careers, babies, etc., we re-connected and never looked back. Our families shared all special occasions and family highlights together. In fact, Rosie and I worked together, as well, and this gave us an extra layer of closeness. And.it provided me with an opportunity to see how incredibly Michelle and Jason, Rosie's and Tom's children, were developing. It soon became apparent that Michelle was an extraordinary child, with exceptional intellect and mental prowess. Every other week (or so it seemed) Michelle was receiving accolades and awards from educational institutions. Fast forward several years and we find Michelle a beautiful, charming, intelligent and charismatic young lady. Newly graduated from the University of Ottawa, Michelle embarked on the career of her choice. Always passionate about making a difference in this world, Michelle took a position with the Government of Canada, so that she could position herself for that very role. Everyone who knew Michelle had no doubt that she would succeed and we were all so proud of her. July 11, 2003 changed everything. Not just for her family, not just for her friends but, I personally, believe it changed things for everyone. Michelle would have made a difference. The loss is impossible to define. I heard the news via telephone and time stood still. The shock was even greater because, along with Michelle's family, no one understood that there was any kind of serious medical problem. I participated in a memorial service, for Michelle, along with so many others, including many dignitaries who spoke of her in glowing terms. Everyone was numb and moving about in a kind of a daze. I am not going to go into the details leading up to this tragic event. Who was wrong, who was right, did the medical system fail Michelle? I will just say that, personally, I believe every step of this medical journey was fraught with complacency and misdiagnosis. Bottom line: nothing will bring Michelle back. The hole is permanent and the loss incomprehensible. Can we do something to change things so that something like this can be prevented for another young person? I hope so. I know that Michelle's family are doing what they can to raise awareness about TTP. When I think of Michelle, now, (which I do very often), I see her beautiful smile and I feel privileged that I was able to be part of her life and she part of mine.
I love you and miss you, Michelle.